Leave the Menfolk Alone
No, we don't need to "re-shape" masculinity. And Kamala Harris makes her Hail Mary pass: she goes on Fox News. It goes pretty much like you'd expect. Welcome to another For Funk's Sake Friday.
Or . . .
We’re down to two weeks . . .1
And here we go.
Victoria’s Secret made history this week.
The show could have stayed in “hiatus,” and I didn’t say they made history in a good way.
My friend used to say “Victoria ain’t got no more secrets.”
She was wrong.
But I wish she wasn’t.
This is one secret they could have kept.
Eh, before you get excited, there’s a reason . . .
The Briton donated his body to the University of Birmingham Medical School after his death at the age of 78 where a “remarkable anatomical variation” was discovered during his dissection.
The unnamed man’s genitals seemed normal from the outside but deeper examination revealed that he had two smaller todgers “stacked” inside his groin.
To be that “blessed” and never know.
What a cruel twist of fate.
Doesn’t this make you wonder how they tested the dolphins’ exhalations to figure this out? Do they do mouth to mouth? Do they make the dolphins breath into paper bags (seems like the bags would get soggy)? Did they put sleep apnea masks on them? What?
Damn. Forgot about the blowhole.
Another fantasy shot down.
People acting hysterically? That would be my first guess.
A new study published in the journal Theory and Society seems to have pinpointed the source of this outbreak of witchcraft panic. And as it turns out, the culprit for the deadly craze is none other than the Johannes Gutenberg.
No, the famed German inventor was not some master of the occult. But his most notable invention, the printing press, is what helped the massive spreading of a new theory of witchcraft in the 15th century, according to this study.
One particularly damaging mass-produced book—a text called Malleus Maleficarum, written in 1487 by Heinrich Kramer, a Dominican friar—reshaped how the Western world saw the practice of witchcraft. As the study writes, this new line of thinking “depicted witchcraft as conspiratorial activity against godly society and not simply mischief by village sorceresses, pagans, or ignorant peasants.”
I hate to tell you, we’re not blaming people’s hysteria on a relative increase and unfettered access to information. The similarities to an unfettered access to info via a free and open Internet are not lost on me. So just . . .
We see what you’re doing.
Just shove it. The only one to blame for the Salem Witch craze is the murderous crazies.
However, another popular tale of the end times (thanks in no small part to the never-ending Marvel Cinematic Universe) is Ragnarök—the cataclysmic apocalypse central to Norse Mythology. Heralding the arrival of this great battle-to-end-all-battles was said to be a period of climatic disaster known as “Fimbulwinter,” or “mighty winter,” when three years of unending winter usher in the end of days.
For years, scholars believed that “Fimbulwinter” may have been based on real events that occurred in and around the year 536 C.E. Scientists and historians widely regard 536 C.E. as the worst year in history, mainly due to three major volcanic eruption events that created a prolonged “volcanic winter.”
Wait, it wasn’t the summer of 2024, the hottest in recorded history!?!
Now, a new study analyzing farming practices in Denmark from the Bronze Age to the Viking Age—published in the Journal of Archaeological Science: Reports—has found evidence that this “volcanic winter” may have very well felt like the beginning of the end for those who lived through it.
But you see, they did in fact live through the three cold, brutal years.
Which isn’t typical of the “end times.”
It’s right in the name.
And I’m guessing Vikings had longer memories than your average American Democrat.
They have been redoing the interstate in pieces around Billings for, well, calculating . . . I’ve lost count. It’s been years. But my sister sent me this article one morning this week . . .
Whelp, I’d like to say I’m surprised, but nope.
Someone was missing on bolt tightening day. Predictable as the sunrise.
Speaking of tax dollars . . .
Welcome to life in the private sector.
By the way, I find it funny that Politico thinks this panic on the part of career bureaucrats would hurt Trump.
Trump 2024: Hey, we found some people to work those fields Miss Nancy was so worried about. You’re welcome.
With CNN’s ratings lagging far behind rivals Fox and MSNBC, several network stars are being offered no pay raises or salary cuts with the message of ‘take it or leave it.’
Former BBC News director Mark Thompson was hired to revive the network in 2023 and his strategy appears to include cutting costs after Chris Licht was fired.
It’s part of what’s rumored to be a winter of layoffs that many at the network fear will be a ‘bloodbath,’ with one source saying ‘the place needs to be turned upside down.’
Well, that’s sort of what happens when you produce a product so dismal that people trust crowd-sourced info from anonymous users on an app over you.
For starters, star anchors Jake Tapper and Wolf Blitzer - making $7 million and $3 million, respectively - signed new deals at the same price, with an agent joking that ‘flat is the new up.’
I’ll take things that didn’t really happen that way for $200, Alex.
Federal disaster workers paused and then changed some of their hurricane-recovery efforts in North Carolina, including abandoning door-to-door visits after receiving threats that they could be targeted by a militia, officials said, as the government response to Helene is targeted by runaway disinformation.
There’s that word “disinformation,” which could mean lies or inconvenient truths. Bets anyone?
The Rutherford County Sheriff’s Office said in a statement Monday that it received a call Saturday about a man with an assault rifle who made a comment “about possibly harming” employees of the Federal Emergency Management Agency working in the hard-hit areas of Lake Lure and Chimney Rock, in the North Carolina mountains.
Authorities got a description of a suspect’s vehicle and license plate and later identified him as William Jacob Parsons, 44, of Bostic, a small community about 60 miles west of Charlotte. Sheriff’s officials said in a statement that Parsons — who was armed with a handgun and a rifle — was charged with “going armed to the terror of the public,” a misdemeanor. He was released after posting bond.
I love that phrase. So why was he just charged with a misdemeanor?
The rest of the story from an intrepid reporter at a local Fox outlet.
The threats came after Parsons posted a message on Facebook calling for people to “overtake” the FEMA site in Lake Lure based on what he says were social media reports that FEMA was withholding supplies from hurricane survivors. . . .
When asked about his post, Parsons explained that he believed FEMA was failing to help residents in need.
“I viewed it as if our people are sitting here on American soil, and they’re refusing to aid our people,” he said. “So we were going to go up there and forcefully remove that fence.”
Wouldn’t you?
Upon arriving at Lake Lure, however, Parsons said he realized the situation was different than he had imagined.
“I went up and saw that there was absolutely nothing there, so I stayed, and I volunteered all day,” he said.
Interesting, huh.
You know what really is at the heart of this problem?
Why?
This was posted on Tuesday (October 15), though admittedly I don’t know when it was recorded.2
Who do you trust more to tell you the truth about FEMA? The media or this guy?
Before you answer that question . . .
Yes, you heard that right. FEMA is struggling to find money now to funnel to people who lost their homes and businesses and loved ones, but in 2021 they could find at least $77 million to fight “domestic extremism.”
So let’s see if I can sum this up: FEMA has spent well over $1 billion to support illegal immigrants in just the last two years, and in 2021 they spent $77 million “combatting” the domestic terrorists that live under every Democrat’s bed. Meanwhile, they offer *checks notes* $750 to each hurricane victim, that’s if said victims can jump through enough hoops to get it.
And from the media, we have . . .
So who do you believe?
That’s what I thought.
Speaking of our immigration issue, for your viewing pleasure, Martha Raddatz on ABC This Week “fact-checking” JD Vance . . .
So we’re down to the last two weeks. The craziness is reaching an eleven on the Richter scale.3 How are the Republicans feeling?
They seem to be fine, actually. I’ve ceased to see articles panicking about JD Vance as a VP pick. In fact . . . from The Hill . . .
In an interview with Lulu Garcia-Navarro of the New York Times, Vance once again refused to admit that Trump lost the presidency in 2020. Instead, the Ohio senator raised concerns about how the Hunter Biden laptop story had been handled in the runup to the that election. When asked if he would have certified the results of the 2020 election, he said no.
“Is it OK that big technology companies censored the Hunter Biden laptop story which independent analysis said cost Donald Trump millions of votes?…I’ve said that I would have voted against certification because of the concern that I just raised.”
Stop for a second and process what Vance is telling us. This no longer has anything to do with voter fraud, even imaginary voter fraud. He is saying that he would refuse to certify a presidential election if he believes the press treated his preferred candidate unfairly.
Actually, censoring the Hunter Biden story was not the press “treating a candidate unfairly.” It was the press putting its thumb on the scale and influencing an election in ways foreign powers couldn’t even dream of, but I guess, if Venezuelans just took over a few buildings, then that was the press being “unfair,” as if it’s normal for a few buildings in our country to be taken over by foreign gangs and for the media to pick the president by shaping people’s reality.
But if Mr. Traux is so worried about certifying elections, perhaps he’d like to address this.
What they’re saying: Rep. Jamie Raskin (D-Md.), the House Oversight Committee ranking member and former Jan. 6 committee member who objected to Trump electors in 2017, told Axios in an interview that if Trump “won a free, fair and honest election, then we would obviously accept it.”
However, Raskin said he “definitely” doesn't assume that Trump would use free, fair and honest means to secure a victory.
Seems danger is a relative thing. Democrats refuse to certify an election, it’s democracy. Republicans, it’s a threat to democracy.
I’m sure that makes sense to someone.
Or my favorite . . .
No, I think Republicans are feeling pretty good.
This, however, is Kamala’s latest attempt to get something, anything to stick to the wall . . .
Trump won’t release his medical records and he is smart enough not to walk into another ambush, so of course that means he has dementia.
Followed by . . .
Now I bought this claim of a Trump senior moment until Rebecca Hollifield kindly set me straight.4 (Trump is a senior after all. I’m not a senior and I have senior moments. There’s a difference between having a senior moment and, well, having a Joe Biden moment.)
And then ABC, of all places, decided to be honest.
You should have seen the backlash on Twitter. Suddenly ABC was Brietbart (they passed Fox News).
So now on to the Democrats. How are they doing? Well, let’s check in with MSNBC.
I know, Joy Reid acting crazy. It’s a day that ends in “y.”
But when it comes to hysteria and conspiracy theories, the right doesn’t have the monopoly.
It goes on from there, and Kami never does say, “No, he can’t just put people who don’t look white in camps even if he wanted to.” But of course hers is the campaign of joy and his is the campaign of fear, so she’s not going to disabuse this person of his, er, joy.
If you want to know why Kamala hides, here is her answer to Bret Baier over the same question.
If you go back and watch the 60 Minutes compilation of cuts that they passed off as an interview, you’ll notice the same answer. Much like a parrot, Kamala Harris can be taught to mimic human speech but actual communication seems to be beyond her.
But the big thing to note here? Kamala Harris is so desperate . . . she went . . . on . . . Fox.
I wasn’t sure what Bret Baier would do. I get the distinct impression the man is not all that fond of Trump, and neither are his bosses. Hey, it’s just what it is. They’re neocons long before they are conservatives or Republicans, and I think many of them would prefer Harris.
But Bret did better than I thought he would. The results were . . . entertaining.
How did it work out for her? Sometimes you find someone on TwitterX that says things so perfectly.
Okay, that’s a bit of hyperbole.5
But it was this bad . . .
Trump’s been running for office so somehow he’s been in control. Biden and Harris have been in office, and somehow they’re . . . not really . . . in control.
I may need someone smarter than me to explain.
Actually, I’m lying. I know exactly what she’s saying, and I don’t like it one bit. If you figure out what she’s saying, you won’t like it one bit either.
Think of rainbow-colored bombs and “Hate Has No Home Here” signs in the lawns of people who carry the most hate in their hearts. Nothing’s wrong in this country that just being “nicer” can’t fix, and that’s Kamala Harris’s turned page.
🎶 You're not good 🎶
🎶 You're not bad 🎶
🎶 You're just nice 🎶
I think that sums it up.6
She also managed to make (another) commercial for Trump.
And right after that, she stepped on a landmine. The clip is long, but watching is worth it for the look on her face when she hears the click and realizes what she’s done.
And this, my friends, is why you don’t let your or your loved ones’ TDS go untreated.
Step . . . click . . . and then boom.
Of course Bret Baier misses the opportunity to ask one highly relevant question here.
It’s not baffling to me. She thought no one would dare ask because no one has dared so far. And not even Bret Baier really did.
And I suppose that was the most disturbing thing about the interview. She says running for president should be hard, but she doesn’t prepare for the most obvious of questions. It’s like she’s convinced her real qualification for the job isn’t her ability to actually do it.
Wait.
I may have had an epiphany.
But the media reaction was what was most delicious.
They were there for the carnage, my dear.
And finally, we have a new word of the day . . .
You know, I’ll be honest. I didn’t think that this interview would really hurt her. It’s Fox News. The viewship knows who it’s voting for. And people live in their steel-reinforced, cement bubbles. It’s not changing minds.
But Mika Brezinski and the crew of Morning Joe seemed to be of a different opinion.
Yup, that’s full-on panic mode right there.
By the way, “ambush” now means “ask the ‘brown lady’ who is owed the right to man the nuclear codes mildly difficult questions and not let her regurgitate canned answers.”
We can add that one to our “presstitute to English” dictionary.
But back to where we started this discussion with one of the most inappropriately named people on television.
Who has really sabotaged Queen Kami’s rightful ascension to the throne, according to Joy Reid?
Well, let’s take a listen.
Yes, men out there, she is talking to you.
Men are in crisis, so sayeth some random chick I don’t know on Morning Joe.
Faux masculinity, huh.
I can’t do this justice. If you really want to laugh, go find Matt Taibbi’s piece or last Monday night’s stream of America This Week on YouTube. The second isn’t paywalled.
Just a clip . . .
You see, the left is trying to redefine “real” men.
Emhoff is an incredibly supportive spouse . . .
Just a real gem . . .
Second gentleman Doug Emhoff did not deny allegations Friday that he “forcefully” struck an ex-girlfriend more than a decade ago following a booze-filled evening in France, instead calling the claim a “distraction.”
MSNBC host Joe Scarborough asked Emhoff in a clip from an interview that will air Monday on “Morning Joe” to respond to several “tabloid stories about your personal life” — an apparent reference to recent Daily Mail reports that he slapped his former flame and hired a “trophy secretary” at his high-powered Los Angeles law firm.
“We don’t have time to be pissed off,” the second gentleman said in response. “We don’t have time to focus on it. It’s all a distraction. It’s designed to try to get us off our game.”
He smacks his girlfriend but he’s now the victim because “Republicans pounce.”
There’s your reshaped “masculinity.”
And if that weren’t enough . . .
Because all gun owners I know pheasant hunt?!? That’s like appealing to motorcyclists by riding a moped.
Carrying a Beretta shotgun, Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz trekked through tall straw-like grass for three hours on Saturday for opening day of the state's pheasant hunting season, but didn't get one shot off despite his efforts.
But it made for some cool pictures, amirite?7
Oh, by the way, that’s this same Tim Walz . . .
Yes, he told people to mask up while hunting . . . in the outdoors.
If you didn’t shoot the deer, they’d laugh themselves to death at grown-ass men wandering around the woods six feet apart with diapers on their faces.
There’s your “reshaped” masculinity.
But the men the Democrat Party is having the most trouble with?
It doesn’t seem like much, but in a tight race, every vote counts.
At first I was offended by Maher’s final comment, but then I thought: that might have been his one moment of honesty. Kamala’s “blackness” is as irrelevant to your average voter as the fact that Trump makes gold sneakers.8
Anyway, as Maher indicated, they brought out the sainted man himself.
Yes, I’ve lost count of the number of black men I’ve come across who
had parents who were in grad school and so were upwardly mobile from the start.
spent their early years in Berkeley, an affluent neighborhood.
spent their high school years in an affluent neighborhood in Montreal.
went to Howard University.
went to Stanford Law School.
Willie Brown-ed their way into politics.
and then went on to consistently fail upward because of their skin color and gender.
See, she’s just like them.
I can’t understand why they don’t get how much she can relate. Just a mystery.
No, we don’t need to “reshape” our men.
We just need to show them a little respect.
You know, all this could have been avoided if the Democrat Party had just practiced a little . . . what is that word again . . . it involves a primary and candidates and voters vetting the candidates . . .
Oh, yes, a little democracy.
It has been a week. I’m ready to leave it behind.
To close us out, a video my sister shared with me.
Enjoy.
Have a great weekend, and we’ll see you next week.
Let’s be honest here. If Trump wins, with what’s going on in the Middle East and the general Republican inability to say no to Israel, we could get a two-fer, both cheaper groceries and the war to end all wars. Wouldn’t that be fun?
I looked it up. Strongest earthquake ever, 9.5 on the Richter scale in Chili in 1960. So an 11 is not impossible, though everything would shake to pieces, which upon final consideration seems an apt metaphor.
Thank you, Rebecca.
As is this, but it’s funny. I found it courtesy of my husband and his SnoWest forum.
I like Bernadette Peters better than Meryl Streep, so you’re getting the stage version rather than the Disney version.
By the way, I am rarely jealous of other women, but I wish I looked that good in a form-fitting red dress . . . and had that aim and coordination.
Right? They were gold? I wasn’t paying attention. I stopped watching him sell stuff when he started peddling Bibles. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I appreciate that he’s not selling the American people down the river, but Trump selling Bibles is a little too on point. Now he only needs his own line of stomach bitters.
4. Thank you Lillia. Surprised to see my name in your excellent post today. Still can’t play some of the videos but it works sometimes if I log out & come back later. No clue why but I’ll let you know 🤔
"... the government doing something shady"
*sniff sniff*
I love the smell of Ron Swanson in the morning.
Happy Friday, Lil! *waves*