Walz-en in the Headlights

How I learned to feel just a tish bit sorry for Tim. That and more on this For Funk's Sake Friday.

My husband’s “uncle” jokes.¹

Tim Walz’s wife is a walking meme . . .

Okay, that’s enough. Onward to other insanity.

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From the Scientific American . . .

So we counter it by “classifying it as a disease and upping children’s outdoor time.”

If the solution is “upping children’s outdoor time,” you don’t need to classify it as a disease. It is a lifestyle choice. Put down the damn phone and get some sun (just not until you finish this FFS Friday post).²

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Also from the Scientific American . . .

And what is this “deeper” solution?

The key is that narrowly defined “fake news”-style misinformation is only a very small part of what causes misbelief. For example, in a recent paper published in Science, we found that misleading coverage of rare deaths following vaccination—much of it from reputable outlets including the Chicago Tribune—was nearly 50-fold more impactful on U.S. COVID vaccine hesitancy than content flagged as false by fact-checkers.

First . . . “impactful” . . . aargh. Nothing is ever “full of impact.” Is it so hard to say “had nearly 50 fold more impact on U.S COVID vaccine hesitancy”? I don’t think so. Who teaches these people to write?

Big breath. Back to the subject.

So what we’re basically saying is if facts discourage people from doing the thing we desire them to do, we should call them “misinformation” and not tell people at all.

That should help with the lowered confidence in our institutions.

With a broader definition that includes misleading headlines from mainstream outlets ranging from the dubious New York Post . . .

Totally true, but still misinformation, because it . . . criticizes Kamala Harris?

to the respectable [if you gag a little here, I don’t blame you] Washington Post . . .

Also true, and very important context if your claim was “the vaccinated don’t die.” But context is now “misinformation.”

existing solutions focusing on falsehoods from fringe outlets will not suffice.

Not only are we going to expand the definition of “misinformation” to even those things that are completely true but people might “interpret” in the “wrong” way, but we’re going to require “policy shifts.”

Expanding the definition of misinformation will necessitate policy shifts not just from social media companies, but for academics and the media as well.

Why do I have a feeling that “policy shift” is a good old fashioned Soviet-style ban on any information that’s inconvenient to the ruling class.

I hate to tell the Scientific American, but no matter how you word it, it never sounds less Orwellian.

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But the story of penicillin—and the many antibiotics and other antimicrobial drugs discovered since—is actually about as classically dramatic as it gets. A keen-eyed doctor makes an accidental, miraculous discovery that revolutionizes the world, saving an unthinkable number of lives and ushering in a new era of medicine. Yet this new, glorious status quo can only last if we remain careful with what we’ve been given. And we have not been careful.

I have news for these people, we haven’t been careful with any drugs we’ve been given.

Maybe we can make a better musical about how Big Pharma gets us all hooked on drugs so they can make a profit?

We can call it . . .

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Take two stories . . .

On Monday, tens of thousands of Americans were hit hard by a widespread Verizon outage, leaving the network offline for several hours. While the issue has since been resolved, the frustration lingers for healthcare workers, students, and countless others who rely on their cell service.

The big question now: what caused it?

According to telecom experts that spoke with CNN, these outages are usually tied to one of three culprits: overloaded networks in urban hubs, botched software updates (like what happened to AT&T), or technical glitches. But while these blanket explanations cover some bases, they don’t pinpoint what exactly went wrong this time.

Not comforting, at all.

And then right on the heels of that . . .

Customers using Bank of America reported having trouble accessing their bank accounts for at least several hours Wednesday.

Reports of problems spiked around 1 p.m. ET, when about 20,266 outages were reported, according to the website Downdetector.

People complained that their account balances were not visible on the app while others said they could access their accounts but that they were seeing a balance of $0. . . .

Bank of America told USA TODAY later Wednesday's that "these issues are being addressed and have largely been resolved."

But no word as to why it happened.

So . . . if I were a suspicious person . . .

I am a suspicious person.

Over/under odds on whether these are just “glitches” or a government (ours or someone else’s) just kind of testing the fences.

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Speaking of wars . . .

I love the wording. I don’t think the bomb cancelled the flights, but whatever.

It didn’t leave that big a crater, but I’d hate to have been in a plane over it when it went off.

Now that’s not something you see every day . . . nor do you want to.

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So if you wonder why CNN has been acting a little weird lately,³ I think we found the answer.

“Starting today, we are asking users in the United States to pay a small recurring fee for unlimited access to CNN.com’s world-class articles . . .

MacCallum wrote. “The vast majority of the 150 million users who visit CNN.com every month will continue to enjoy the same experience as they do today. Only after users consume a certain number of free articles will they be prompted to subscribe. . . .

It is not immediately clear how many articles users will need to click to hit the paywall. CNN says that the paid subscriptions will cost $3.99 per month or $29.99 per year to start.

Now I’m in a real quandary. Does CNN’s coverage provide me with enough entertainment for $4 a month? What is hate watching worth?

“Foot the bill for CNN’s journalism.”

When you put it that way, I’m insulted that they’d ask me. They owe me for the hours of torture they’ve put me through.

I’m not sure how well this will go. Remember CNN+?

CNN+ lasted less than a month.

All I have to say is . . .

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Favorite new phrase of the week . . .

I don’t give a fig about “homogeneity.”

But I think instead of “deporting” people, we can “remigrate” many of our own “uninvited foreigners.”

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You know one way you can always tell it’s election season?

The big picture: A commission, historians, lawyers, and others have investigated the 1921 Tulsa Massacre, but the DOJ never has, leaving Black victims and later their descendants with little acknowledgment from the federal government or compensation for generations of trauma.

I hate to tell you, but if you want to impress people, maybe handle the problems right in front of you, like . . .

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But don’t worry. Biden has this well in hand.

You hear that. He was commanding. He was on the phone for four hours.

I hate to tell him, but I have spent more time on the phone trying to arrange a potluck with my in-laws . . . with similar disastrous results.⁴

But I am glad that he is trying. I mean, it’s not like he’s so out of touch that he just sort of forgot that there was a storm.

Can we get a factcheck on whether or not the people are “happy” about what’s being done?

And where was our VP who is so very concerned with the American dream and the poor and downtrodden during all this?

In her busy schedule, she found time to tweet . . .

And take a photo as proof . . .

Notice anything here? Last I checked, wired headphones need to be plugged in . . .🙄

and those sheets of paper look pretty empty, like Kamala’s head. 😏

And when she finally did speak?

I’m not afraid to steal from other people when they state it better than I . . .

Contrast these two with Boris Johnson.

The UK-produced jabs were kept in a Dutch facility at the beginning of 2021. Some five million doses of the COVID-19 vaccines were packed into the warehouse – which the former Prime Minister staunchly insisted belonged to Britain.

And the Netherlands weren’t just turning them over. So Boris came up with a plan . . .⁵

With no resolution on the horizon, Boris Johnson – as stated in his upcoming memoir – soon turned to some of the top officials within the Armed Forces. It was suggested that British troops could navigate the Dutch canal systems to reach the factory in Leiden.

“We would send one team on a commercial flight to Amsterdam, while another team would use the cover of darkness to cross the Channel in inflatable boats and navigate up the canals.”

“They would then rendezvous at the target, enter, secure the hostage goods, exfiltrate using an articulated lorry, and make their way to the Channel ports. But if we are detected, we would have to explain why we were invading a NATO ally.” | Boris Johnson

Boris Johnson was willing to do a panty-raid on the Dutch to get his people vaccines.

Joe and Kamala can’t be bothered to leave the beach and their glitzy friends to get people off mountainsides.

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In all seriousness, if you thought Maui was a one off . . . oh, no.

The theme here is that our government is not just useless; it’s worse than useless.

But here’s the trick. It seems to have been only civilian hands, at least from Friday up until Wednesday.

Note the date on the article: October 2nd.

This isn’t Hawaii we’re talking about, with the excuse of being clear across an ocean. This is right here in the continental US. And here’s what’s going on.⁶

His wasn’t the only story of being told to stay out of the disaster area.

And then Mayor Petie made it official . . .

But you see, the “emergency responders” have not been “responding.”

This is a clusterf— as big as Maui, but right here just south of DC.

And why exactly can they not get their act together?

My husband has a theory that they simply don’t have the resources because the funds have been allocated to other things, but they don’t want to admit it. And maybe Jack Posobiec is right. They don’t want you to see.⁷

My other half was just spitballing, but there’s evidence he’s right.

Mayorkas was not specific about how much additional money the agency may need, but his remarks on Air Force One underscored concerns voiced by President Joe Biden and some lawmakers earlier this week that Congress may need to pass a supplemental spending bill this fall to help states with recovery efforts.⁸

“We are meeting the immediate needs with the money that we have. We are expecting another hurricane hitting,” Mayorkas said. “FEMA does not have the funds to make it through the season.”

But the catch?

Congress recently replenished a key source of FEMA's response efforts, providing $20 billion for the agency's disaster relief fund as part of a short-term government spending bill to fund the government through Dec. 20. The bill also gave FEMA flexibility to draw on the money more quickly as needed.

Where did all that money go?

From the Homeland Security page itself.

But this is just the tip of the iceberg.

This funding augments the $259.13 million in SSP grants that DHS distributed in April 2024.

This grant cycle provides a new opportunity through a competitive program and builds on the support being provided to communities on the border and in the interior. Last year, more than $780 million awarded through SSP and the Emergency Food and Shelter Program – Humanitarian Awards (EFSP-H) funding in Fiscal Year 2023 went to organizations and cities across the country.

So by my math, nearly $1.5 billion just in this set of programs alone laundered from FEMA funds to cities and organizations to “help” our uninvited guests.

And American citizens are trying to save themselves while the government (local or federal, it’s all government) obstructs them.

I’d like to say I’m surprised, but . . .

On Tuesday night at the debate, I almost thought we might get a question about this impotent blob that takes so much of our money and then is nowhere to be found when we need them . . .

Climate change. They used it to try to “get” Vance on climate change. As if we care at this point.

But then again, the hurricane is Trump’s fault, so maybe it’s all one in the same.

“Hurricane Helene…what if GOD is punishing MAGA populations for their hate and hypocrisy? Works for me!” Betsy Packard wrote Sunday in a heartless post on X punctuated with a winking emoji.

Well, I suppose we all should be grateful that she found God.

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The VP debate was Tuesday night.

You know, I really shouldn’t say that. Not that I was impressed with Tim’s intellect. (Quite the opposite actually). But I came away feeling sorry for Walz.

This guy is in way over his head.

That is not exaggerated. That was how he looked. The MSM called it “intense” and “passionate.” . . .

From Politico (found via Twitter)

It sure did grab my attention, but not in a good way. I don’t think I want the second in command looking like he is scared witless in a debate on a friendly network. He’d wet himself in any truly adversarial or intense situation.

But why wouldn’t he be scared . . .

That’s a rough crowd.

It was a gaffe, but it made for good fun.

Te-he.

It was toward the end of the night and I suspect the adrenaline was wearing off and Tim Walz has failed just one too many steps upward, and his head full of stuffin’ knows it.

CBS had promised not to “fact check,” but the two moderators almost immediately broke that promise.

But interestingly enough, they never broke it again, which suggests someone got their backside chewed through their earpieces or during the break.

I suspect the conversation went a little like “God damn it, we don’t want to be ABC-ed! Knock it off.”

When SNL notices, it’s bad.

But otherwise the debate was blissfully boring and not really hard to watch.

No, the most fun was the “after party,” where MSNBC turned loose their panel of clapping seals . . .

Listen to them. Don’t they remind you of this, times five?

And while CNN was forced to admit that Vance won . . .

(That woman hates Donald Trump by the way. Later I think she was crying in the bathroom.)

MSNBC held tightly to its made-up world.

Let’s just hit a couple of these.

Walz did not get “mixed” up on when he was in China. His lies were so blatant and repeated, finally even CNN couldn’t hide from them . . .

He previously said he visited Hong Kong in “May of ’89,” weeks before the Tiananmen Square massacre in Beijing. During a 2014 hearing of the Congressional-Executive Commission on China honoring the 25th anniversary of the Tiananmen Square protests, Walz, then a Minnesota congressman, appeared to recall specific details of his trip to the region at that time. . . .

Walz further claimed in a June 2019 radio interview that he was in Hong Kong on June 4, 1989 – the day of the Tiananmen Square massacre. . . .

During a 2009 hearing of the Congressional-Executive Commission on China to commemorate the Tiananmen Square protests, Walz claimed that he was in Hong Kong at the time, preparing to go teach in China.

But . . .

[C]ontemporaneous newspaper reports first resurfaced by the Washington Free Beacon, a conservative news outlet,⁹ place Walz in Nebraska around that time. An issue of the Alliance Times-Herald dated May 16, 1989, features a photo of Walz touring a Nebraska National Guard storeroom. In the photo’s caption, the paper notes that Walz “will take over the job” of staffing the storeroom from a retiring guardsman and “will be moving to Alliance,” Nebraska. A separate newspaper article about Walz’s planned trip to China published by a Nebraska-based outlet in April 1989 reported that he planned to travel to China in early August of that year.

You know, if he hadn’t been such a limelight hog, he might have gotten away with it.

How did he handle the truth catching up with him?

Honestly, I’m not going to judge him too harshly. I think that, much like Trump,¹⁰ Walz embellishes. Unlike Biden, I don’t think he’s made it a way of life (“oil cancer,” seriously?). But it’s catching up with him. And, no, he wasn’t “mistaken.” He was lying.

Also, to Ms Rachel’s point, saying you’ve made friends with school shooters is also kind of embarrassing.

But the one who was coping hardest of all was the ever (Un)Joy(ful) Reid.

This was, I think, in answer to Symone Sanders, who was angry at Tim Walz for being too nice.

The fact that Trump is not Romney and Vance is not Ryan is the only reason I’m voting for them. Otherwise . . .

And, yes, this is a completely normal election. It’s the media that’s gone screaming past abnormal to “can we get some straight jackets in here please?” The rest of us were happy for a moment of civility.

And weren’t all these people just harping about “unity” a bit ago? About wanting less division? But now they don’t want it? These people really need to make up their minds.

Besides, as dumb as Walz is, he was smart enough to know that in a real knockdown, drag-out fight, he’d come out the loser. He’s not quick enough. And I actually kind of liked this Tim Walz, though there’s no way in hell I’d vote for him.

But we have thirty some days of this to go . . .

*sigh* I don’t know what Donald Trump thinks, but I know that Joy Reid thinks: Trump is in fact winning. How do I know? This is so over the top that “Circle Back Psaki” is even giving her the side-eye.

And Reid isn’t alone in thinking that Trump is ahead. How can I tell?

From Politico . . .

To me a beard conveys that my husband is too lazy to shave.¹¹

And then there’s this . . .

Yup, those numbers must be pretty bad.

And soon Tim might not be the only one sporting the deer in the headlight look.

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I turned forty-nine this week. When I was thirty-one, I came very close to not being here. I had a meningioma, a “benign” brain tumor. I put “benign” in quotes because someone else I came across around the same time had one tucked up under, against the brain stem. She was a pianist. She was given the choice between surgery, which would almost certainly eliminate her ability to walk and talk much less play piano, or let it kill her.

She chose the latter.

But given that I’ve come across more than one thirty-something woman with a glioblastoma, a malignant brain tumor, who only lives about two years, well, let me just say, “There but by the grace of God . . .”

So, yes, I’m a little bummed about being this close to fifty, but I could have been gone a long time ago and would never have had the joy of so many experiences, including doing this. So all in all, it’s a good life. Now on to the big 5-0.

We lost two really great people this week.

And soon afterward . . .

All the good ones are leaving us.

For your spoonful of sugar, two clips from Matt Taibbi’s speech at Rescue the Republic . . .

And the sentiment I think we can all relate to . . .

We’re off to the farm in North Dakota this weekend, so I’ll catch you in the comments as I can. Until then, have a great weekend and see you on the flip side.

1. Which are actually worse than your normal “dad” jokes, at least according to the niece.

2. Okay, you can go. Just don’t forget to come back.

3. Weird as in committing random acts of actual journalism.

4. Just kidding, mostly. (I don’t think any of them read this anyway.)

5. He definitely needs a sidekick named Natasha.

6. This video showed up on RealClearPolitics, so I feel safe in posting it. I would think the RCP “vetted” this guy.

7. There are other conspiracy theories. As a shameless plug for my Saturday morning post, I’m going to tease a segment on them there.

8. And by states, why do I have a feeling we also mean the 51st state of Israel and the 52nd state of Ukraine and the 53rd state of Taiwan . . .

9. CNN has to mention this because somehow that makes the facts less true?

10. Don’t crucify me here, please.

11. Same outlet by the way . . .

What are you going to do but laugh?